[ he knows when he mentions the hutt that he's made a mistake, but his voice trails off as leia continues. and han decides to drop it, but he makes a mental note to drop by and visit her.
no part of that journey had been good. for anyone.
and so han continues where leia leaves off. ]
It'll be fine, one way or another. No telling when the Atroma are going to drop off another kid, so we may as well get used to it now.
{ elize lutus, too, is by herself. why is han adopting all of these lonely little girls, god dammit. ]
It just means I'm stuck on this ship until further notice.
[She shakes her head a second time when he says her name. Don't. If they have to have that conversation--and one of these days, they'll probably have to--it's not happening from two ships away.]
Considering how many they've already picked up, I'd guess tomorrow. [Let's be completely real here, Leia might have been in similar straits with Steven Universe if he hadn't mentioned that he had someone here to take care of him.]
I'll transfer as soon as I can. [Because let's be real, she still has every intent of doing so.] Until then, I'd rather you were there. That captain of yours sounds like a real piece of work.
[ with the world's laziest salute -- though now that koala is squared away, and han more or less knows what he wants to do with greed, he can shift his focus to leia. that shake of the head had been read loud and clear, and he's not going to force her to talk about anything.
[And be just a little keyed-up until that point, neatening things up and generally doing a ship-long equivalent of pacing. Idleness--let's be honest here, boredom--feels more egregious to her when something's about to happen.]
[ true to his word (though it's closer to two hours), han steps onto the windrose from the transport. it only takes a moment or two to find leia, and he leans in the doorway of the kitchen.
[She glances up from where she's telling herself she's organizing things (she's not, she's just keeping her hands busy, but the point remains), and a little smile crosses her face.]
Took you long enough.
[There's no real bite in her voice, just fondness as she crosses the small room.]
[ a bit shrewdly, but. you know. han is in a testy mood. his ship is full of teenagers and hot messes and smol children and han doesn't deal well with any of those (or, at least, he's convinced he doesn't). but he sighs, and shrugs to himself. ]
The stupid fake show is gonna get their ratings, anyway. I better get a paycheck out of the headache -- has over here been calm?
[The Windrose is mostly full of adults and droids at this point, praise be.
But she doubts he's only here to compare ships, and there's no way she's discussing anything private within earshot of any crewmates. Leia glances down, reaching out for his hand.]
Come on, let's go somewhere with a door that shuts.
[ reasonable. han never thought he would actively miss having lando around but this is ridiculous. but at her request, his catty remark is immediately tempered, and he lets her take his hand, threading his fingers neatly through hers. ]
-- lead the way.
[ he's really only here to check on her, and to see her -- he's already vented out all he needs to vent out, but han is fairly good at reading leia. something is bothering her on a deeper level than she's willing to admit, and so he lets her lead him along, though he's curiously looking around as he goes.
[It's not a long walk from the kitchen to her bunk, and while the door latches, there's not much else to recommend the space. It's tiny, the cot is lumpy, and the only thing Leia's added to the room is a palm-sized salt statue from Arslae.
But it's what she has to work with, and Leia waves him in, taking care to shut the door behind her.]
That poor girl. There must be something more we can do for her.
[Easier to talk about than most of what's on her mind, and probably, she thinks, more productive.]
[ han is fortunate, and the huntress is heavily upgraded. leia's room is smaller than his, and his bed is bigger. but he keeps that to himself, and lets leia close the door behind them, though he soon takes up position leaning against the far wall, sighing. ]
Who knows.
[ with a slight frown ]
I got told to be patient.
[ ten points if you can guess what wise jedi master told him that okay ]
[Leia gives Han a sour expression, but it doesn't hold. With a sigh, she tips her head back, the braids at the crown of her head brushing against the wall.]
I hate thinking of a child living that way. I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.
[What happened to her and what happened to this girl aren't the same thing, not in the slightest, but that's what she keeps coming back to: a bone-deep sense of disquiet at the thought.]
[ and, finally, han pushes himself up off the wall to cross the room, taking a seat on the cot next to her, leaning back against the wall. he's quiet for a long moment, almost giving leia the room to talk more if she wants -- but then han decides he wants to continue. ]
He's dead, Leia.
[ it's said quietly, and he rests his head against the wall too, considering that for a moment before speaking. ]
You two shouldn't have even gotten involved in what he was doing.
[Which is to say, I know. The memory still lives inside her, though, and there are times when her skin still crawls with remembered sensations. You don't forget the texture of a Hutt's tongue that easily.]
The alternative seemed worse. [She turns her head slightly in his direction, watching him from the corner of her eye.] We couldn't have left you behind.
[ his eyes are watching a spot on the ceiling, as he talks. luke and leia really could've just left -- they just chose not to, and han is grateful for that. he knows chewie wouldn't have stopped until he found han, and he knows lando probably wouldn't have either. under threat of death from said wookiee, or maybe because he cares.
who knows. ]
But I'm glad you didn't.
[ han pauses, though. ]
He deserved worse than whatever you gave him.
[ he has no idea what happened, really, on much of that day. he had been out of it, and blind, and trying to recover in way less time than was needed. everyone was fine, in the end, but a lot of the details are hazy. and luke and leia hadn't exactly been forthcoming with the information. ]
[She had loved him, and she'd lost too many people she loved in too few years. The thought of knowing where he was and doing nothing about it--when, this time, something could be done--would have been impossible to bear.
Waiting for the opportunity had been bad enough. She can't count how many times her thoughts strayed to him during Operation Yellow Moon.
Leia's lips press together into a thin line, her gaze shifting away from Han's profile into the middle distance.]
He was never going to pay for the things he did.
[A new bitterness slides through her voice. Jabba the Hutt had years to indulge his gluttony unchecked, and the number of lives he'd ruined--or snuffed out entirely--must have been astronomical. As thoroughly as Leia believes in her ideals, she doesn't think there's any punishment possible to balance the crimes he committed or the slaves he kept.]
Choking him with the chain he put around my neck will have to be good enough.
[ there's a silence, at that, and han looks over at her, his brow furrowed.
chain around her neck? was that what jabba had done with her after capturing her? put a chain around her neck and... done what, exactly? did what with her? or to her?
the urge to be angry is pretty compelling, and he is -- furious, that jabba had thought it was acceptable to treat her that way, but anger won't help leia now. instead, han gently pushes himself closer to drape an arm over her shoulders. ]
Should've dragged his body behind the Falcon for a few thousand miles.
[Leia can guess what he's thinking--not in detail, but that dark little comment doesn't come out of nowhere, and she knows Han. If he'd seen her at her most humiliated...
She'll never stop being grateful that he didn't. That Luke had to is bad enough.
When he puts an arm around her, she doesn't shrug it off, but she doesn't curl into his side like she usually does, either. The cot's not all that stable--that's the excuse if she needs one, though she doubts she does--and Han's warmth is no protection from the facts of the matter.]
You worked for him.
[Not accusatory, just a statement of fact. She doesn't meet his gaze.]
You know how he treated his...
[Slaves.
She doesn't want to have to say it aloud. The fact that she was counted among Jabba the Hutt's personal possessions--the fact that his includes her, if only for a few days--churns her stomach.]
[ han is quiet for a long moment before heaving a sigh. ]
-- Jabba picked me up after he heard about the Kessel Run.
[ it's not often that he talks about his past (and even now, he's leaving a lot out), but han feels like leia, of all people, deserves to know how han wound up working for jabba in the first place. ]
He paid well, and he paid me... a lot. But I got boarded one run by the Empire, and I had to drop the cargo, 'cause I made the stupid mistake of thinking Jabba might want his best man not in a jail cell, but turns out he got pissed when I couldn't reimburse him for what I had to drop, and put a price on my head instead.
[ which is pretty common knowledge, in the underworld. when jabba the hutt got pissed at someone, the entire galaxy tended to know about it, especially when that person was han solo. ]
When Kenobi and Luke found me, I was trying to get out of it. I figured if I could pick up a few more jobs, i could pay Jabba off, and get the hell away from him -- but Ben promised me seventeen thousand credits to bring them to Alderaan. Which was what I needed. I was gonna use it to pay Jabba back, get away from him... [ han exhales, puffing out his cheeks slightly as he considers it. ] Which obviously didn't happen.
[ han had come back for luke, and then they had relocated to hoth. and when han tried to leave, the empire had found them. and then... well, the rest leia knows. jabba is dead, but there's alway going to be scum like jabba in the world. and han considers that before continuing. ]
There's a difference between... robbing people who deserve it and then there's people like Jabba, who deserve to get lobbed into the nearest black hole. He's got nothing worth saving, or adding. I used to want to rip out his tongue and feed it to Chewie, but I didn't want to poison my first mate.
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no subject
Date: 2016-01-11 09:58 pm (UTC)[ he knows when he mentions the hutt that he's made a mistake, but his voice trails off as leia continues. and han decides to drop it, but he makes a mental note to drop by and visit her.
no part of that journey had been good. for anyone.
and so han continues where leia leaves off. ]
It'll be fine, one way or another. No telling when the Atroma are going to drop off another kid, so we may as well get used to it now.
{ elize lutus, too, is by herself. why is han adopting all of these lonely little girls, god dammit. ]
It just means I'm stuck on this ship until further notice.
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Date: 2016-01-11 10:12 pm (UTC)Considering how many they've already picked up, I'd guess tomorrow. [Let's be completely real here, Leia might have been in similar straits with Steven Universe if he hadn't mentioned that he had someone here to take care of him.]
I'll transfer as soon as I can. [Because let's be real, she still has every intent of doing so.] Until then, I'd rather you were there. That captain of yours sounds like a real piece of work.
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Date: 2016-01-11 11:11 pm (UTC)[ with the world's laziest salute -- though now that koala is squared away, and han more or less knows what he wants to do with greed, he can shift his focus to leia. that shake of the head had been read loud and clear, and he's not going to force her to talk about anything.
but... ]
Mind if I come see you later?
[ read: he's going to come see you later. ]
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Date: 2016-01-11 11:23 pm (UTC)You're always welcome over here.
[Read: Please come see her later.]
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Date: 2016-01-11 11:28 pm (UTC)Give me an hour or two, and I'll be there.
[ he has to ensure greed isn't, like. doing anything stupid. ]
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Date: 2016-01-11 11:32 pm (UTC)[And be just a little keyed-up until that point, neatening things up and generally doing a ship-long equivalent of pacing. Idleness--let's be honest here, boredom--feels more egregious to her when something's about to happen.]
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Date: 2016-01-11 11:55 pm (UTC)throat clears. ]
I like your ship.
{ he's made an attempt. ]
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Date: 2016-01-12 12:01 am (UTC)Took you long enough.
[There's no real bite in her voice, just fondness as she crosses the small room.]
The Windrose is all right. Good people on board.
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Date: 2016-01-12 02:48 am (UTC)Well, nobody shot me when I came on board, so I guess that counts for something.
[ lightly, and han pushes himself up straight. ]
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Date: 2016-01-12 02:57 am (UTC)[Ah, bickering and back-and-forth. Something to take some comfort in.]
How're things over there?
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Date: 2016-01-12 03:15 am (UTC)[ a bit shrewdly, but. you know. han is in a testy mood. his ship is full of teenagers and hot messes and smol children and han doesn't deal well with any of those (or, at least, he's convinced he doesn't). but he sighs, and shrugs to himself. ]
The stupid fake show is gonna get their ratings, anyway. I better get a paycheck out of the headache -- has over here been calm?
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Date: 2016-01-12 03:31 am (UTC)[The Windrose is mostly full of adults and droids at this point, praise be.
But she doubts he's only here to compare ships, and there's no way she's discussing anything private within earshot of any crewmates. Leia glances down, reaching out for his hand.]
Come on, let's go somewhere with a door that shuts.
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Date: 2016-01-13 04:08 am (UTC)-- lead the way.
[ he's really only here to check on her, and to see her -- he's already vented out all he needs to vent out, but han is fairly good at reading leia. something is bothering her on a deeper level than she's willing to admit, and so he lets her lead him along, though he's curiously looking around as he goes.
the ships are different, as it were. ]
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Date: 2016-01-13 04:28 am (UTC)But it's what she has to work with, and Leia waves him in, taking care to shut the door behind her.]
That poor girl. There must be something more we can do for her.
[Easier to talk about than most of what's on her mind, and probably, she thinks, more productive.]
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Date: 2016-01-13 04:31 am (UTC)Who knows.
[ with a slight frown ]
I got told to be patient.
[ ten points if you can guess what wise jedi master told him that okay ]
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Date: 2016-01-13 04:41 am (UTC)For the moment, Leia takes a seat on one end of her cot, back against the wall.]
It's not bad advice [these things take time, after all], but I don't want to sit around and do nothing.
[A glance over at Han.]
How are you doing?
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Date: 2016-01-13 05:01 am (UTC)You first.
[ c: ]
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Date: 2016-01-13 02:52 pm (UTC)I hate thinking of a child living that way. I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.
[What happened to her and what happened to this girl aren't the same thing, not in the slightest, but that's what she keeps coming back to: a bone-deep sense of disquiet at the thought.]
no subject
Date: 2016-01-13 06:49 pm (UTC)[ and, finally, han pushes himself up off the wall to cross the room, taking a seat on the cot next to her, leaning back against the wall. he's quiet for a long moment, almost giving leia the room to talk more if she wants -- but then han decides he wants to continue. ]
He's dead, Leia.
[ it's said quietly, and he rests his head against the wall too, considering that for a moment before speaking. ]
You two shouldn't have even gotten involved in what he was doing.
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Date: 2016-01-13 07:08 pm (UTC)[Which is to say, I know. The memory still lives inside her, though, and there are times when her skin still crawls with remembered sensations. You don't forget the texture of a Hutt's tongue that easily.]
The alternative seemed worse. [She turns her head slightly in his direction, watching him from the corner of her eye.] We couldn't have left you behind.
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Date: 2016-01-13 07:22 pm (UTC)[ his eyes are watching a spot on the ceiling, as he talks. luke and leia really could've just left -- they just chose not to, and han is grateful for that. he knows chewie wouldn't have stopped until he found han, and he knows lando probably wouldn't have either. under threat of death from said wookiee, or maybe because he cares.
who knows. ]
But I'm glad you didn't.
[ han pauses, though. ]
He deserved worse than whatever you gave him.
[ he has no idea what happened, really, on much of that day. he had been out of it, and blind, and trying to recover in way less time than was needed. everyone was fine, in the end, but a lot of the details are hazy. and luke and leia hadn't exactly been forthcoming with the information. ]
no subject
Date: 2016-01-13 07:34 pm (UTC)[She had loved him, and she'd lost too many people she loved in too few years. The thought of knowing where he was and doing nothing about it--when, this time, something could be done--would have been impossible to bear.
Waiting for the opportunity had been bad enough. She can't count how many times her thoughts strayed to him during Operation Yellow Moon.
Leia's lips press together into a thin line, her gaze shifting away from Han's profile into the middle distance.]
He was never going to pay for the things he did.
[A new bitterness slides through her voice. Jabba the Hutt had years to indulge his gluttony unchecked, and the number of lives he'd ruined--or snuffed out entirely--must have been astronomical. As thoroughly as Leia believes in her ideals, she doesn't think there's any punishment possible to balance the crimes he committed or the slaves he kept.]
Choking him with the chain he put around my neck will have to be good enough.
no subject
Date: 2016-01-13 07:49 pm (UTC)chain around her neck? was that what jabba had done with her after capturing her? put a chain around her neck and... done what, exactly? did what with her? or to her?
the urge to be angry is pretty compelling, and he is -- furious, that jabba had thought it was acceptable to treat her that way, but anger won't help leia now. instead, han gently pushes himself closer to drape an arm over her shoulders. ]
Should've dragged his body behind the Falcon for a few thousand miles.
[ it's said under his breath.
-- maybe a little anger. ]
no subject
Date: 2016-01-13 07:59 pm (UTC)She'll never stop being grateful that he didn't. That Luke had to is bad enough.
When he puts an arm around her, she doesn't shrug it off, but she doesn't curl into his side like she usually does, either. The cot's not all that stable--that's the excuse if she needs one, though she doubts she does--and Han's warmth is no protection from the facts of the matter.]
You worked for him.
[Not accusatory, just a statement of fact. She doesn't meet his gaze.]
You know how he treated his...
[Slaves.
She doesn't want to have to say it aloud. The fact that she was counted among Jabba the Hutt's personal possessions--the fact that his includes her, if only for a few days--churns her stomach.]
no subject
Date: 2016-01-13 08:26 pm (UTC)-- Jabba picked me up after he heard about the Kessel Run.
[ it's not often that he talks about his past (and even now, he's leaving a lot out), but han feels like leia, of all people, deserves to know how han wound up working for jabba in the first place. ]
He paid well, and he paid me... a lot. But I got boarded one run by the Empire, and I had to drop the cargo, 'cause I made the stupid mistake of thinking Jabba might want his best man not in a jail cell, but turns out he got pissed when I couldn't reimburse him for what I had to drop, and put a price on my head instead.
[ which is pretty common knowledge, in the underworld. when jabba the hutt got pissed at someone, the entire galaxy tended to know about it, especially when that person was han solo. ]
When Kenobi and Luke found me, I was trying to get out of it. I figured if I could pick up a few more jobs, i could pay Jabba off, and get the hell away from him -- but Ben promised me seventeen thousand credits to bring them to Alderaan. Which was what I needed. I was gonna use it to pay Jabba back, get away from him... [ han exhales, puffing out his cheeks slightly as he considers it. ] Which obviously didn't happen.
[ han had come back for luke, and then they had relocated to hoth. and when han tried to leave, the empire had found them. and then... well, the rest leia knows. jabba is dead, but there's alway going to be scum like jabba in the world. and han considers that before continuing. ]
There's a difference between... robbing people who deserve it and then there's people like Jabba, who deserve to get lobbed into the nearest black hole. He's got nothing worth saving, or adding. I used to want to rip out his tongue and feed it to Chewie, but I didn't want to poison my first mate.
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